Eight years ago, I received a thank you card from a person that I looked up to and had a tremendous amount of respect for.  It wasn’t an ordinary “Thank You” card as nowhere on the card did the words Thank You appear.  It had one of those cool motivational pictures on it and above it the words The Essence of Character . Underneath the title were these words:

“Your true character is revealed by the clarity of your convictions, the choices you make, and the promises you keep.  Hold strongly to your principles and refuse to follow the currents of convenience.  What you say and do defines who are, and who you are…. You are forever.”

I wasn’t given this card because I was being told I lacked character, I was given this card because I showed  my true character during a very difficult situation.  As the statement above reads, character defines who you ARE as a person.  It’s not your income that’s going to determine if you’re successful in life, it’s your CHARACTER.  Your income may signify that you’re successful in your career, but there is so much more to life than your paycheck.

If you’re extremely wealthy, but can’t keep your family together, is that successful? If you can run a fortune 500 company, but can’t stick to an exercise program for 30 days, is that successful? And if you can drive a $100,000.00 car, but can’t afford to buy high quality foods, is that considered successful?  Too many people get so caught up in becoming financially successful, that they compromise their character at any cost.

Your true character is who you are as person, and influences every single aspect of your life. Who are you when no one is watching?  How do your actions change when no one  is around?  Accomplishments and failures don’t determine your character, but rather how you respond to both.  I’ve definitely had my share of fu*k ups in the past, and have regrets that I battle with daily, but never once do I view any of those as failures.  I’ve taken something positive from every mistake I’ve made, and I’ve never compromised my character to get back on my feet or ahead of someone else.

Character and success go hand in hand.  If you have a genuine and loyal character, you’ll be successful in all areas of life (physical, financial, relationships, family, etc.).  You MUST use the resources around you, not take advantage of them.  Develop your character and apply it to every goal you set in life. Stupid Gym Shit is being a genius businessman, but lacking the determination to eat healthy for 5 consecutive days.  Stupid Gym Shit is being so caught up in your own personal success that you lack a genuine interest for the people around you.  You’ll only be as great as the people you surround yourself with and the choices you make will define who you become!

Last week I was interviewed by celebrity trainer, Billy Beck III.  It was a humbling experience because it gave me a forum to showcase my knowledge and passion and interact with Billy, an expert in the field and someone whose character and business sense I admire.  It also gave me a chance to become aware of the way my colleagues view me and value my opinion.  It was an exciting opportunity to share my experience and expertise.  If you’d like to check out the short interview, click here.

“Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are. “

-John Wooden

Gym lingo is an important aspect of making your gym experience both entertaining and safe.  There’s a lot of crazy shit that goes on in most gyms and I’ve decided to make it a point to educate you on what to lookout for.  Below is my “Top 20 List” of some common circumstances you may run into during your journey of achieving optimal health and fitness.  Although a few of these may seem a bit extreme, I guarantee that if you pay attention, you’ll see every one of these take place within the next 2 weeks.  Good luck!

1)   The Joker: This is the lady that wears a full-on clown mask each time she comes to the gym. Full make-up to the gym is definitely Stupid Gym Shit, and Batman wouldn’t be impressed.

2)   The Tea-Bagger: This is the guy who spots his buddy on the bench press, and thinks it’s necessary to get so close that he’s actually straddling his workout partners face. Gross but it happens all the time!

3)   The 7-Day Traveler: These are the guys that carry around their oversized duffle bags from machine to machine the entire duration of their workout. They have so much unnecessary shit in there, you’d think they were going on vacation for a week.

4)   The Moth-Man: This is the guy that wears the shirt that’s been attacked by moths. He’ll spend $30 a month on a gym membership, but won’t go to Wal-Mart and buy 10 new shirts for $5.

5)   Cardio Queens: These are the people that spend all their time on the cardio equipment and never physically change. They usually get great enjoyment from taking 45-60 minute “cortisol showers” each time they do their cardio. For a more detailed description of Cardio Queens, click here.

6)   The Disappearing Heart: This happens when you sit on a bench or seat with a sweaty ass.  When you stand up, your ass leaves an imprint of a heart on the bench, and within 10 seconds it magically disappears.  Now some people’s heart looks more like a round bar-table, but we’ll save that for another post.

7)   The Crash-Test Dummy: This is the guy that feels that it’s necessary to wear every piece of protective brace available.  He’ll often be seen wearing gloves, lifting straps, elbow braces, knee braces, ankle braces, and of course a weight belt.  I’ve even seen some guys lifting weights with a mouthpiece in.

8)   The Illusionist: This is the guy that only wears shirts one-size too small.  With the extra small shirt on, he gives off the illusion that he’s bigger than he actually is.  That sneaky bastard!

9)   Sticky Fingers: We’ve all seen these people.  These are the people that go to use the bathroom and don’t think it’s necessary to wash their hands before going back onto the workout floor and grab all the handles and weights.  Definitely think about this one next time you feel like rubbing your eyes and face with your hands while training.

10)   The Crop Duster: This is that person who lays that silent fart in the middle of the workout floor and then knowingly scurries across the workout room spraying everybody that’s in his or her path. (compliments of Johan “The Dragon” Duluc of ElDragonFitness.com)

11)   Spiderman: This is the guy that wears the skin-tight spandex shirts while he works out.  His reasoning must be that there is so much wind-resistance in the gym that all the excess wind-drag from a regular shirt would hinder his bench press and bicep curl performance. Go climb a wall Spidey!

12)  The Night-Club Bouncer: This is the person that sits on a machine or bench for hours and will not move. And if that wasn’t bad enough, they make up some B.S. excuse as to why you can’t work in with them.  Guess that’s why they don’t have a real job, right? Ouch!

13)  The Fish-Out-Of-Water: This is that person who decides that form and technique are never a concern.  Whether they are squatting, pressing, rowing, or curling, they flail around like a fish-out-of-water using nothing but momentum to lift the weight, and wonder why their back is sore the next morning.

14)  The Walking Waterfall: This is the person that sweats profusely on everything.  Typically these people begin to sweat just from changing in the locker room.  Small lakes have been known to form around them if they remain in one spot for too long. (compliments of Jessica Karp of JessicaKarpFitness.com)

15) The Labor Room: This is also sometimes referred to as the Brothel, because you’re either going to experience one of two sounds the loud grunts similar to a mother giving birth, or moans that make you feel like you’ve just stumbled upon an underground Brothel. Either way, we all know who these people are and have heard their ludicrous “I’m lifting so heavy I have to moan and grunt” sounds quite often.

16) Ego-Lifters: The description of these individuals is so complex I dedicated an entire blog post to them.  If you haven’t seen it yet, and are still a bit confused at what an Ego-Lifter is, then click here.

17) The Peeping-Tom: This is the pervert that comes to the gym everyday and always decides to go on the back row of the cardio equipment.  He does nothing more then walk on the treadmill and look at all the eye-candy in front of him. You’re not fooling anyone and we all know who you are!

18) The Slip N’ Slide: This is that person who sweats like a pig on a bench and doesn’t think they need to wipe it up.  If you catch someone doing this, you have my permission to take off your sweaty sock and slap them across the face with it.  Tell them Stupid Gym Shit said you could do it!

19) The Fruit Basket: This is in reference to all those guys who find it necessary to wear biker shorts or spandex to they gym while they workout.  I don’t care if you rode your bike to the gym.  Roll up a pair of real gym shorts, stuff them in your bike fanny pack and CHANGE!  We’re all tired of looking at that compact-little fruit basket when you lay down to do bench presses. (compliments of Johan “The Dragon” Duluc)

20)  The California Raisins: These are the group of old guys that do nothing more than sit in the sauna every day.  They can often be spotted by their wrinkly skin and over-developed man boobs.  The stationary bike and a few push-ups would be a much better investment of time for these guys!

If I’ve left any out that you feel should be included in this Top-20 list please let me know.  But you must give me a name and description so we can add it to Stupid Gym Shit Gym Lingo Part Two!

Just as “cardio queens” are taking over all the cardio equipment, “ego lifters” are growing in population all over the weight-training room floor.   We’ve all seen them, and I’m sure many of us can admit to even being included in this group at some point.   Ego Lifters are those individuals on the workout floor that have one goal in mind with every workout, to lift as much weight as physically possible to boost their almighty egos.  These individuals are never hard to spot.  They typically travel in packs (2-3), talk more than they workout,  wear spaghetti string tank-tops, and make excessively loud grunting noises when they are lifting as if they were giving birth.

Although Ego Lifters usually adopt at least one of the traits mentioned above, you can always be assured that form and lifting technique is never a consideration.  I’m going to give you the definite give away that an Ego Lifter is lurking nearby.  During your timed rest period in-between sets (because you always time your rest periods), try to observe the Ego Lifter in action (if they ever look away from the mirror to actually get some work done).  They’ll probably be doing some sort of bicep curl because I often hear them chanting; “Curls for the girls.” If the motion they are performing looks more like they’ve taken a shot from a stun gun, rather than a controlled, standing bicep curl, be assured you’ve just witnessed an Ego Lifter in action.

Maybe I’m being a little overdramatic with my explanation, but you know EXACTLY whom I’m referring to.  There’s no exception to compensate form/technique for lifting heavier weights.  World Class Olympic weightlifters are probably the strongest individuals around, and they perform some of the most complex movements known.  If they didn’t have phenomenal technique and flexibility, they would suffer traumatic injury due to the incredibly high loads.

FORM IS ESSENTIAL!

These are the most common movements you’ll see Ego Lifters perform:

• Squats: Instead of squatting down below 90°, they often only bend their knees to about  45° or less (most will be on the leg press anyway because they can put more weight on it, leading to an even more boosted ego).
• Bench Press: They’ll excessively arch their backs to the point that a small dog can jump through the opening created. They’ll often times only lower the bar a quarter of the way down instead of going through a full range of motion (ROM).
• Bicep Curls: You’ll see the back bend backwards to positions you never thought possible, and you’ll see the shoulders swing back and forth placing more work on the shoulders than the biceps (not effective)
• Seated Cable Rows: When performing seated rows properly, the torso should remain straight and NEVER move forward or back throughout the movement.  Ego Lifters will flail themselves forward and back as the weight travels up and down, appearing as if they are dodging bullets like in the movie The Matrix.

I learned a long time ago to never give advice unless its asked.  I’ve tried to assist Ego Lifters many times in the past, and 99% of the time they would NEVER take my recommendation.  Why not?  Because the amount of weight they were now able to do was almost cut in half!  Very few of these individuals can set their egos aside long enough to observe the tremendous benefits they could achieve if they lifted properly.  Absolutely NO ONE cares how much weight you can lift!  Last time I checked, there weren’t any bench presses set out on the sand at the beach, and clubs/bars are never promoting bicep curl contests.  Oh that’s right, your girlfriend is with you because of how much weight you can lift.  She’s a keeper!

If you are one of these individuals, I challenge you to perform every movement with proper form and through a full range of motion.  You will not only elicit a greater hormonal response, which will make you stronger and bigger, but you’ll save those precious tendons and ligaments that you’ve been stressing by using shitty form for so long!

The last training facility I worked at was notorious for Ego Lifters. I once saw an Ego Lifter complete the most horrific set of bicep curls I’ve ever seen, and then immediately stare himself down in the mirror as if he was caught in a trance.  Next time I looked back at him, he was dry humping himself on the mirror.  Stupid Gym Shit Police to the rescue!

Choosing a personal trainer or strength coach requires more research than just walking into your nearest gym and asking for the next available trainer.  This is a major “Stupid Gym Shit” topic because there are way too many individuals paying for a training service that is completely unjustified.  I’ve been astonished by what I’ve witnessed during a client’s training session in gyms across the country, and I often question why they ever return for another round of Stupid Gym Shit!

Before you jump into a training program with the next available trainer, take a second and conduct a small amount of research.  The internet is great way to look at the qualifications of a fitness professional.  Before embarking on any exercise program, you’re most likely going to have a consultation with the potential trainer.   During these consultations is when the trainer asks the bulk of the questions, but I encourage you to show up prepared with your own list of questions.  Anybody can be a personal trainer and the scary part is that anyone can give themselves a “certified” personal trainer title.  All you have to do is go on the Internet and buy one of these B.S. certifications, and the next thing you know, you’re printing business cards with title of “certified” personal trainer under your name.  I strongly believe this is why many trainers get a bad reputation. It’s just way too easy to get into the industry. Below is a list of what is important to know before hiring a fitness professional/trainer.

• Education: Degrees in an Exercise Science related field is always a plus.
• Experience: How long have they been a trainer?
• Certifications: What current certifications do they hold (they do expire)?
• Client Testimonials: You want to see before and after pictures here.  Written testimonials are good, but the pictures speak for themselves.
• Personal Experience/Accomplishments: What fitness related goals has the trainer personally achieved (awards, completing a marathon, fitness competitions, workshops, etc.)?

*    Personality: Does their personality work with yours?

There are only about 4 nationally recognized personal training certifications. They require a trainer to have a strong foundational understanding of health and fitness.  The certifying organizations are listed below and within each certification there are usually specialty certifications as well (corrective exercise, weight management, etc.).

1)   National Academy of Sports Medicine (NASM)

2)   American College of Sports Medicine (ACSM)

3)   National Strength and Conditioning Association (NSCA)

4)   American Council on Exercise (ACE)

There are many other advanced and specialty certifications out there besides the 4 listed above, but these are the basic 4 national certifications that you want to look for when hiring a fitness professional.

Many people already have a trainer and I’m sure they’ve done their research before any hiring took place.  But this wouldn’t be a Stupid Gym Shit article if I didn’t point out what doesn’t fall into the category of being an ACTUAL fitness professional.  Now of course some trainers will do a few of these here and there, but if you find a pattern forming, I question how well your money and time is being invested.

• If your trainer doesn’t have a workout program for you, they’re not a professional.
• If your trainer doesn’t regularly measure your progress and share it with you, they’re not a professional.
• If your trainer puts you through the same workout routine as the other 6 people they trained for the day, they’re not a professional (workouts should be specific to each individuals goal and level of experience).
• If your trainer walks into work with a McDonald’s cup or potato chips, they’re not a professional (we all splurge, but NEVER at work)!
• If your trainer texts or answers a call during your session, they’re not a professional (most professionals don’t keep their phones on them during a training session).
• If your trainer never corrects anything you ever do, they’re not a professional (trainers are not professional rep-counters and I guarantee your form isn’t always perfect).
• If your trainer is late, cancels on you, or is consistently rescheduling you, they’re not a professional.
• If you workout more frequently and are in better shape than your trainer, they’re not a professional (there are some exceptions to this, but not many).
• If your trainer doesn’t motivate, inspire, and set achievable goals, they’re not a professional.

There is so much more I can add to this list, but these are the main faults I see which separate personal trainers from fitness professionals.  To be a professional you must first be an expert in your related field, and then deliver outstanding service.  There are plenty of trainers out there with a master’s degree and every certification you can list, but for some reason they can’t effectively put all that knowledge to use and inspire someone to outstanding results.  Knowledge is great, but motivation is what’s going to get results.  Does your trainer motivate and inspire you?  If the answer is no, I welcome you to fall under the category of Stupid Gym Shit because you’re the one contributing to their paychecks.  Never settle for anything but the best, and you deserve just as much commitment form the trainer as they do from you.  Don’t be a bargain shopper when searching for a trainer.  I can almost guarantee that you’re going to get what you pay for.  Quality fitness professionals are probably going to cost you between $60 – $100 per session, depending on the experience and location of the trainer.

Cardio Queens are taking over gyms worldwide and the numbers are growing out of control. We must put a stop to these people right away or our gyms & training facilities are going to turn into oversized hamster cages with people running on wheels and going absolutely nowhere. We’ve all seen them and I can tell you their routine before they even step foot into the gym. I’m referring to those individuals that base every single workout around cardio and 60-minute group exercise classes with the desire of losing fat and getting fit.

99% of Cardio Queens have the same goal in mind, to jump on apiece of cardio equipment for a sustained length of time with the goal of dropping weight or body fat. Notice I said both “weight” & “body fat”. The two are not the same and differ tremendously. Weight is everything your living body is composed of (muscle, fat, bones, organs, blood, etc.) & body fat is strictly fat and nothing else. The majority of these Cardio Queens will weigh themselves daily, before they exercise, & after they exercise to see the changes in what the scale reads. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news, but any changes in weight from day to day or hour to hour are not the result of body fat changes, but rather fluid fluctuations.

What in the world is a Cardio Queen? Cardio Queens are those individuals that sit on the cardio equipment for usually about 45 or more minutes and pretty much don’t do anything else. They rarely lift a weight except for their Ipod, magazine, or book, and they train at an intensity of an 80 year old. Their only concern is how long they’ve been on that machine for and how many calories that machine is telling them they’ve burned. Another reality check people, your actual total caloric expenditure (calories burned) is probably half of what that piece of cardio equipment is reading out to you. Unless that piece of cardio equipment knows your gender, age, heart rate, body composition, exercise experience, height, and weight, how in the world can it figure out how many calories you’re actually burning? All those variables factor in to determine how much energy (calories) your body is exerting to perform any given task.

Since most Cardio Queen’s goal is to decrease body fat (decrease weight) and get a tighter and firmer look, let me give you a few tips to enhance your results and turn you into a fat-burning machine.

1. No cardio program should be longer than 30-35 minutes max! The only exception to this rule is if you are training for some type of endurance event that requires you to continuously be exercising for over that length of time (triathlon, marathon, distance sports, etc.)

2. All cardio should be interval-based. No long, slow, steady-state cardio where your intensity is never changing.

3. If you’re not sweating and breathing hard, you’re not doing cardio

4. If you can hold a conversation, you’re not doing cardio

5. If you can keep a straight face, you’re not doing cardio

6. If you wear make-up to the gym (very stupid gym shit) and it stays on your face while you’re doing cardio, you’re not doing cardio

7. If your out-of-shape friend next to you can keep up with you, you’re not doing cardio

8. If you can read a book, magazine, or text message, you’re not doing cardio. The only time you should be able to scroll or skip to a new song on your Ipod is during your resting interval.

9. If you can maintain that same mode of cardio for longer than 30 minutes, you’re not doing cardio

10.  If the intensity is so low that your heart-rate isn’t increasing, you’re not doing cardio

Why spend any longer period of time doing cardio if it’s not necessary. Exercise is like anything else. You should focus on exercising smarter, not harder. Cardio Queens get way too caught up in the length of time and lose focus on what really brings results….INTENSITY! There is a time and place for long, steady-state cardio, but if your goals are to transform your body and dramatically increase your cardiovascular fitness, high-intensity interval training is the way to go.

Most gyms today designate the largest area to cardio equipment because that’s where people are spending the majority of their time. You never have trouble getting onto a squat rack or using the free weights, but how many times have you gone to get on a treadmill or elliptical machine and had to wait? Like I said before, Cardio Queens are taking over and giving cardio a bad reputation. When you do endless ours of cardio a week, you end up blowing right through all your lean-body mass giving yourself that “skinny-fat” appearance. Who wants to look skinny-fat? Long duration cardio also increases cortisol output. Cortisol is a stress-hormone our bodies produce under any time of stress. When you do long (over 40 min) bouts of cardio, the release of cortisol increases dramatically. The negative aspect of cortisol is that it’s a muscle-burning & fat-storing hormone (we want the opposite). It specifically stores fat in the stomach region, so kiss those potential six-packs goodbye!

So lets put a stop to all this “Stupid Gym Shit” of doing cardio for 60 minutes and reading a magazine while we spin our wheels. Kick the intensity up a notch and be finished in half the time. There really is no wrong way to do cardio-intervals except if your intensity sucks (meaning low). Try this next time you’re going to do cardio and I don’t care what machine you choose to do it on. You’re going to go as hard as you can for 60 seconds, and then rest for 60 seconds. Repeat this for a total of 10-12 times (20-24 total minutes). This will be less than 25 minutes of cardio if you can complete all 12 intervals. If you really challenge yourself and give a maximum effort each working 60-second interval, I guarantee you’ll want to quit between the 8-10th interval.

Every individual who exercises has the same goal in mind…..RESULTS! You will get leaner, firmer, and your cardiovascular fitness will increase all at the same time. What more could you possible ask for out of a cardio program? Oh yeah, one more thing. Don’t be fooled males, I’ve seen many of you take on the role of Cardio Queens too. So do me a favor, kick up the intensity, cut down on the total time, and inspire the person on the piece of cardio equipment next to you to do the same. Be a solution to the problem and please don’t contribute to all the “Stupid Gym Shit” that goes on! Future posts will have specific interval programs to follow, but in the mean time just kick ass in everything that you do inside the gym!

Let me take a moment to welcome everyone to “stupidgymshit.com” and tell you what this site is all about. I’ve worked continuously in fitness centers & gyms for over a decade, and over that time span I’ve seen & heard some pretty “stupid gym shit”. People spend way too much time listening and taking bad advice and don’t even know the first place to look for the right answer.

The questions are endless and cover everything from weight training & cardio, to nutrition & supplementation. How many people actually walk into the gym and have on paper exactly what it is they are going to do for that training session? The answer is very few and if you don’t believe me, walk into any major commercial gym (24hour fitness, Gold’s, Bally’s, etc.) and count the number of people exercising that have a workout program in hand that they are actually following. I’m not talking about the individuals that record in a journal every amount of weight used for every set, but rather a mapped out plan of what they are going to do from start to finish. I promise that you will never reach your true potential without a plan of attack from before you even step foot into the gym.

How long should I workout? What is the best mode of cardio to perform? What do I eat? What supplements should I be taking? These are all common questions that people who are into health fitness ask & the goal is to give legitimate & scientific advice to get people going in the right direction. Just because people look fit and workout everyday doesn’t make them a credible source of what your personal problem may be, and what works for them may actually be detrimental to you. The phenomenal thing is that any question you may have is right at the end of your fingertips. The Internet has opened up the gates of information & communication so you’ll never be left with a question unanswered. All you have to do is know where to look. There are many credible sources out there and at the same time there is 10 times more B.S. sources. Anyone that appears fit, works out, and has a subscription to Muscle & Fitness Magazine would like to consider themselves an expert. Just because you can produce results on yourself doesn’t necessarily mean it’s going to work on the next person. An expert is someone who can mimic outstanding results with people over and over again regardless of what their personal goals are.

This site is not designed to insult people on what they thought they were doing right. Its main purpose is to educate people on what “The Truth” really is when it comes to health & fitness. So please don’t be offended when I tell you that inner & outer thigh machine is only going to make your ass bigger (we’ll get to that at a later post) because when you spend more time & energy doing what’s correct, the results will come twice as fast and probably with half the effort.

I’ve been fitness professional for over 11 years and have had the opportunity to learn from some of leading professionals in the fitness industry. Health & fitness have been my life & my passion for most of my life and witnessing the transformations people go through as they reach their fitness goals is life changing. I am committed to bringing you only the truth about all the “Stupid Gym Shit” that goes on. Enjoy!